*Sigh*

Well, Tommy got his job! And in about a year he will have his own office where he wants! So exciting! He likes it, which is the best part. To be honest I think he just likes the fact that he has a job and isn't sitting at home expected to cook and clean.

Yesterday I went to his mom's house and we went through Jaden's clothes to give some to Ashley for her girls. Jaden is Tommy's cousin, Dillon's brother Matthew's daughter. Matthew and his girlfriend needed help so they asked Tommy's mom to watch Jaden for them. Jaden ended up living with them for the better part of two or three months. They did everything for that girl with no help from the parents, not even on food and diapers. Which was fine, together the five of us did everything we could, with help from other family and the church. We had all talked about wanting to keep Jaden and adopt her. But we couldn't just yet because her mother was pregnant with another baby. 

I suppose you would have to know Matthew and his girlfriend to understand, Matthew is a sorry piece of shit that refuses to get a job or take a bath. Jennifer, Jaden's mother, is state certified (gets a check) retarded. The day Jaden was born the nurses called DFACS because they did not believe that Matthew and Jennifer were capable, competent parents. Jennifer didn't even have the strength to hold Jaden who was almost a year old and still weighing 15lbs (she hadn't made it onto the growth chart yet!). 

Anyway, Tommy's mom and dad and Tommy and I spent every second with that little girl that we could. I had hoped to one day call her mine or at least my sister-in-law. But one day Matthew and Jennifer came down wanting to take Jaden to see his mother and they never came back. We had tons of clothes, toys, food and other baby necessities. They did not even get her medicine (Jaden was very constipated and had went to the doctor for it). We have gotten to see her once or twice before her mother moved to North Georgia with her family and we aren't allowed to see her. Its sad really, I love that little girl. 

Anyway, we went through all her clothes to give to my friend Ashley's little girls. I haven't got to see them yet but I am hoping that I will get to keep them sometime soon. Seeing everyone else with babies makes me want one but I know I need to finish school first. Tommy's mom said that she can't wait for us to have babies, which didn't help any. I do know that I need a better job, a place of our own, and better cars before we even think of having a baby. Still, its always right there. 

Ugh, I have sssooo many things to do for the wedding that is in nine days. I am getting excited and nervous (but not cold feet!). I hope everything goes perfectly, and even if it doesn't its okay. I will be getting married to the man I love. 

Have a good day!

Jen